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Not being hot alone is grounds for murder. If I were you, I would so be down for skipping during a period, jacking that shit up and unscrewing the oil filter juuust a tad...if it's a Cherokee you may be able to just slide right under. Being both an ugly woman AND a Jeep driver, she would call a repair shop...if she asks you if you did it, say you didn't do it, and give her one of your friends she doesn't know's cellphone number as a repair shop. Have your friend say that the problem is her "transductive oil chamber ejection port," and you can't get it from a dealership because it breaks so rarely, only in accidents. Have her pay $500 for that shit, tighten up the oil filter, chill for an hour, come back outside and split that with your friend.
Oh yes, revenge is sweet.
-Matt
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