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The second story, is much, much shorter. A couple of weeks ago we had a heatwave here in socal, right before it started raining. I'm here in the office, working. Office window blinds are open, ah nice.. sunshine coming into the office, great.
The window shows the parking lot, my car, my co-workers' cars, the neighbor's house.. I see birds flying around, an occasional squirrel running around.
This time.....
hehehe I shit you not....
haha man, I am laughing as I'm writing this...
THIS TIME, I take a look out my fucking window...................
hahahahaha
and I SEE A FUCKING woman................ taking a PISS................ behind my wife's Mazda Miata.
what
the
FUCkl?$@!?$!@?$!@?$!@
She had JUST pulled up her "workout clothes" so I didnt see any poonanny or any peeing-action, for any of you weird fetishists, so fuckoff. But I saw enough, because:
1) She wasnt good looking
2) She was like 40 or 50
3) She looked crazy, you know..
i mean,,...... YOU KNOW how crazy people look. They always LOOK crazy, like something is wrong with them.
Anyway it was hot, I went outside and saw she was gone. And within 15 minutes the pee had evaporated, how nice - the beauty of nature. Anyway, about 15 MORE minutes pass and I see that bitch again, and she starts walking BACK to where my Miata is.. and she's talking on her cell phone....??
WHAT? I dont even have a cell phone, by choice of course, because I dont believe in having these electronic ball-and-chains. But this crazy bitch has a cell phone, and yet she's riding a bike?? Anyway, I raise my index finger and make the "no-no" gesture and, she leaves on her bike. The End.
Fucking WEIRD place we live in. And still, this doesnt even hold a candle near ANY of the shit I've seen in LA. Burbank is a much more calm, and quiet place to live.
Minus the crazy women who like to pee in the back of our office.
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