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12-26-2002, 05:13 PM
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#1 |
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Will never get banned...
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: San Diego CA
Age: 44
Posts: 1,510
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Holy crap!
<---------------me so sexy love myself long time boom boom nothing to boku!
So yeah tofu is still at customs detained once he gets out we will try again to rule zilvia! *pisses in s13grls gastank and removes valve stem cores and places cap back on* MUAH HA HA HAH AH AH HA AHHHHHHHHHHHH
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12-26-2002, 05:19 PM
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#3 |
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Will never get banned...
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: San Diego CA
Age: 44
Posts: 1,510
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YES SEMPER FIDELIS AND A OHHHHHH RAHHHHHHHHH to you too
to bad someones a mod and edited their boo boo
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12-26-2002, 05:20 PM
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#4 |
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Married to the Mob
 
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???
 WTFs with you??? You can't even get to my car anymore, you crazy? You'll travel to CO? And besides, there's 4 240s parked in front of West's right now, you won't know which one's mine. Hee, hee.... |
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12-26-2002, 05:23 PM
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#5 | |
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Will never get banned...
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: San Diego CA
Age: 44
Posts: 1,510
Trader Rating: (0)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
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Quote:
yes the one with IL plates, and if not i have enough bladder for 4 tanks  ! And your crazy why did you post under my name just cause your a mod that doesnt mean you should start topics with my name! Im telling mom!
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12-26-2002, 05:30 PM
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#6 |
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Married to the Mob
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Good one, Lourans. I should change your password.
DA REAL CAMPPAIN: http://www.zilvia.net/f/showthread.p...threadid=20481 DA REAL CAMPPAIN: wow 12 veiws DA REAL CAMPPAIN: lol S13Grl: lol DA REAL CAMPPAIN: yee hawwwwww DA REAL CAMPPAIN: west is gonna hate me S13Grl: :-) DA REAL CAMPPAIN: lol S13Grl: lol whatfor? DA REAL CAMPPAIN: j/k DA REAL CAMPPAIN: people are gonna be like DA REAL CAMPPAIN: "why is camppain starting topics like this?" DA REAL CAMPPAIN: i think tofu rubbed off on me S13Grl: i think so too S13Grl: there's something gone haywire in your system, mister DA REAL CAMPPAIN: yeh mybe yewr rite S13Grl: haha DA REAL CAMPPAIN: luke! omf im tybooing! S13Grl: hahahahhaha DA REAL CAMPPAIN: ajj crape S13Grl: :-) S13Grl: what's with you? DA REAL CAMPPAIN: nothing im bored |
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12-26-2002, 05:58 PM
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#7 | |
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BANNED
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Quote:
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12-26-2002, 06:39 PM
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#8 |
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Premium Member
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Clearwater FL
Age: 41
Posts: 3,226
Trader Rating: (0)
 Feedback Score: 0 reviews
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I once took a walk to the local gas station to pick up some soda when I ran into my friend Mr.Monkey. Mr.Monkey whooped and hollered at me, he eventually pissed me off so I walked away. After picking up my drink I proceeded to walk back home, little did I know Mr.Monkey was following me home. So I get home and sit down and flick on the TV and drink my newly aquired soda, no less the 5 minutes after sitting down I hear a knock on the door. I get up and answer the door to find that no one was there, pissed off I slammed the door. Exerting all that energy answering the door got me hungary so went to the kitchen. I walk in and who do I see? Mr.Monkey himself stealing my babanas, it appears he walked in the back door. I call him a dumb rat bastard and corner him. All of a sudden he drops a load into his hand and throws a big steamy pile of feces at my face. Then he runs out the door with all my bananas! If I ever see him again I swear I'll beat those naners out of him
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12-26-2002, 07:43 PM
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#10 |
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Married to the Mob
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One day, I logged onto zilvia and found all the members postwhoring without condoms. I got really upset and thought about closing the topic in question. Instead, I am going to go to the gas station, and buy these members some mini-condoms so that they may healthily continue on post-whoring in my footsteps. Thank you, children... thank you. You make me very proud. Please see your local health clinic for free STD testing the week after Christmas. God is giving... be thankful ye followers, be thankful.
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12-26-2002, 07:52 PM
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#11 |
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Will never get banned...
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: San Diego CA
Age: 44
Posts: 1,510
Trader Rating: (0)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
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kidzelda did you edit a convo with you and your boyfriend and put me and irenas names in thier?
after all your a guy with zelda the princess? that sounds like a plea for help coming from the closet
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12-27-2002, 02:09 AM
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#12 |
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BANNED
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finally got out of customs
so i went to japan to grab sum vk45dd's packing one inder each arm. went to the airline bought 3 tickets, the plan was to fly them back secret like. well iw as boarding hte plan and the custom agent went "hay those rnt people" i said o **** all ninja and ****, throw a star at him, but i forgot i was in japan, he threw a star back. i was like "boom boom booom...everybody say WAYHOO WAYHOO", everyone in the ****en airport stared throwing stars, then the agent pulled out his katana, i was like " HOLLA!" good thing i was packing the chinese ww2 doa, slice that cheap blade like candy. so i picked up the engines and ran for the plane, i couldnt believe it i MADE IT. is got all comfortable, fitted the engines beside me, the plan took off. 2 days later im in the us...i'm thinking "DIZZAM" i made it!, well i was getting off and the two BIGGEST midgets i have evern seen pulled me aside, kicked my ass, then took me to the customs holding cell
 they wanted to charge me with so much ****..good think i lied and said i was under the influance of wasabi, there were like cool and let me go, they sent the vk45dd's back tho  |
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12-27-2002, 02:15 AM
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#13 |
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Will never get banned...
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: San Diego CA
Age: 44
Posts: 1,510
Trader Rating: (0)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
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yesssssssssss
as yew cen se my acompliss tofu has ben insuregtet frum costumes. now all shall treble in feart!!!!!!!!
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12-27-2002, 02:16 AM
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#14 |
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BANNED
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ok ok last year...
the us. goverment sent camppain and i to south america, were were suppose to take out the coco cartell over there. camppain being a wanna-be marine and me being a jack- of-all trades it seemed fitting. we were droped off in panama and walked on foot for hours. good thing a friendly person drove by and offered a ride, i gave hima swift kicked to the head and me and camppain made off with his car, leaving him on the side of the rode. i took his wallet while i was at it so he couldnt call anyone
 anwayz when er finally got there it was a mess, the pathetic army hershy choloet sent were lying on the floor, i was like man, this **** is crazy. i saw on of the leader coco cartel move to me. i was like, we have come to make a bargin. he told his troops to put down their weapons and came to me. camppaine snaped his neck like pancakes, then the fire fight started. it was cool tho cuz me and camppain was backing nampal and we alreay swaped in a vh45de(supercharged) in the car we jacked, we set the naplam on fire and made our way back to the U.S. no wonder chocolet is so $ now...o well  |
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12-27-2002, 02:22 AM
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#15 |
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BANNED
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how camppain invented hip hop
back in 1985 no one was doing hip hop every one was still in the whole r&b stuff, cammpain was a young lag, and just move to the states. in nyc he saw a guy name red hound, the maester of the mace, he was know to junk off of building and start brak danceing. one day he landed on young camppain while camppain was eating a cold frozen dessert. camppain was like "WTF, man im gunna bust a cap in ur HIP if u dun get back", red hound then replied "Hop back shorty, before i rock ur sox"...well they free style batted all day until red hound got tired and just clobbered camppain. every was like...hip hop = freestyle...THATS THE **** YO, the DOLLA DOLLA BILL!
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12-27-2002, 02:30 AM
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#16 |
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BANNED
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the drift to rember
one day camppain came up to me and said " i bet u they dont do dog flips in alaska". i was like "wtf, aslaska is where dog flips came from! BIATCH!" so we were **** it, lets take a road trip to alaska. so we back up his 240sx, fit as many fake dog furs in the back (thats currancey in alaska), we made our way up into canada. i was getting bored not driving and since the radio was broken it was just camppain freestyleing for hours...i was like **** this **** im driving now...after a while i notice were were low on gas, and camppain was like....i used my last $ on this cool chick feather for good luck i was like
...**** the only way where gunna make it to alaska is if i do the "ULTRA DRIFT" , camppain yell "NO DONT, NOT THE ULTRA DRIFT!" but i was to late. i got the car to 155mph, then put it side ways were went side ways from ontario all the way to alaska, the great canadian mounteis were hot on our asses, sthinking "Wtf is that, eh" we made it all a way, thsi is why they call the great skid mark in canada "the tofu line" cuz i made it, anyhow it turns out i was wrong nad they dont do dog flips in alaska. we just sent the fake dog furs on salmon snacks, gas, and frozon alakan pon |
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12-27-2002, 02:37 AM
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#17 |
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Will never get banned...
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: San Diego CA
Age: 44
Posts: 1,510
Trader Rating: (0)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
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that was only wun off the storeys thier wass a mission sent ouwt to all the top agent acros hte wurld. so tofoo bought it two mai atenshun. i read the manualscript and gave the grean lite. we were one our way to the secrete location when the charter plane full of mule dung and dead chickens was hit by a rocket luncher. luckily tofu had a vh45 engine we managed to rig up the thing to wok to be abl to land safely. once on the ground tofo got attacked by a pack of wild humping spider monkeys. after sacrificing his leg he caught up with the rest of us threw the safari limping and loosing blod. i made a make**** prostthetic leg out of bamboo and donkey dung from the plane that tofu had been eating. our tour guide pedro the 4 nippled sasquatch fell into a trap and died instantly. i dont want to say how it was terrible.
finally we made it trhwe the junkle. me all good tofu with his prosthetic bamboo and dug leg and we thought we were set to tackle the mission at hand.............untill pedro walked in as a zombi he bit tofu......me being the quick thinker and better looker quickly used my training andripped sasquatches head of. tofu was really looking bad after a few hours, he wasnt even eating the dung no more so i fed him to a anacondom nicole smith after she dropped him out as feces i thought all was done for four my favorite pnoy. when i realized the donkey dug had regenrated his leg and brought him back to life......only drawback was he was now japanese........ dont ask we proceded to the heavily armed columbian bogata fortress and said hello to tofus lil friend caca the cacaroach and killed daun juan the lexicon who was smuggling cacaroachs and mexican drinking water with the help of kid zelda the man whore. all in all im glad i got my buddy back even though now hes black...... dont ask
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12-27-2002, 02:38 AM
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#18 |
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BANNED
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mission to mars
every wonder why the mars probe blew up insade of landing, well let me fill you all in with sum TOP SECRET information
 ...in 1995 nasa detected life forms on mars, small creatures, actualy we believe them to be halfings, just like a mini-human, not a midget or a drawf, a human with same perportions just smaller. now the women alians of mars were imcreadably hot. but them men were stupid and evil...well that's waht we believed cuz we wanted the womenenz ...anyhow, the plan was to kill the men, take over the planet and start an intensive cross- spieces mateing program...for piece of course...the women were interested but the men wer enot. they taught th idea was "evil" and attack us. in june of 1998 the attack happend, three alian vessuals came to earth , they landed on camppains car while he was drinking beer. he ran into the house crying aobut it. i wa slike STFU u drunk biznich..well i went out side to see these little men walking all over the wreckage that was his car...i was like LIKE WHOA...so cmappain and i took turns at kicking their asses, there were quite dumb trying to take up one on one. they tallest one was like 4'0 and i beat his ass like a daddy to his 6th grader son, ruthless, after our noblem battle the country gave camppain and i the rights to be in the mateing program |
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12-27-2002, 02:46 AM
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#19 |
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BANNED
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beating a dead man
camppain and i was out of luck on month. no $ what so ever... camppain tried whoring out his ass but it seems his ass was to low quality for any real $, he made a couple of bux but it was just his mom feeling bad for him. we kept looking at the classifieds and found a cool joke as grave diggers, all he had to do was dig a gravem throw the dude in and cover it we got $200 per grave, cammpain was into the idea at first but i taught of a great plan, we went to eht Kat dealership and hot wired a kat dirt picker upper thinggy, the manager on duty tried to chase up but we easy ran over him
, anway were were amkeing great $, with the kat dirt machine digger and covering graves was no sweat, were did about 100-200 a day, i taught the $ was great but at the time camppain had a very bad taffy candy addiction, he would blow 1000-4000 a day on taffy, so he need more $, one day these mobsters told us if we beat dead bodys up before we barried them he would give ups $ per body, sounded great, so he would show up with the body, me and camppain would beat the living **** out of it...i mean it was dead alrady then we would bury it.. 3 months rolled by and we were beating dead bodys like crazy, every day we would take turns just doing wreseling moves and crap on them kick the **** out of them everything, well the fbi rolled in and arrested us both turns out the body's were really dead, camppain and i was facing alot of problems, they want to send us to jail, so we did the only nobel thing to do. we feld on bond and came back under different names hehe  Last edited by wherezmytofu; 12-27-2002 at 02:51 AM.. |
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12-27-2002, 02:48 AM
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#20 |
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Will never get banned...
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: San Diego CA
Age: 44
Posts: 1,510
Trader Rating: (0)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
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so a preist a rabbi and a sha man walk into tofus house the shaman says i bet i can make you penist beger tofu was excted. i told him it was a trick and so did the prest and rabbi. but tofu wanting to actually get laid went for it............the went to the batroom and came out touf had a shoocked luke on his face.
i axed him if it workeda nd he siad yeahs but...........it was now black.... so the preist said he couls exercise it to mathc his skin colors o tfuo said ok.... the rabbi and shaman said noooooooo but tofu still cock strung on having a wee wee bigger than a tic tac went ahaed. and it worked so it was cool tofu started bangin axl to test it out and he made fun of his hat so axl got mad and left. i told tofu thats not what i meant about gettin pu$$y, but i forgot to speak in tofus language of typos so it was kinda lost. but thne i talkd to himi n his langage andh e understand so he went wit thisf at gir land had a good time
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12-27-2002, 02:55 AM
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#21 |
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BANNED
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3 monkeys
3 monkeys sit on a tree
one monkey likes to fling pee one monkey likes to beat cats one monkey likes to brake bats (on poeople's heads) 3 monkeys laugh at a dog 3 monkeys beat up on frogs i head monkey hands bring good luck 3 monkeys got their hands cut off liek f u c k i made that up just right now HHHAHAHAHA |
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12-27-2002, 02:59 AM
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#22 |
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Will never get banned...
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: San Diego CA
Age: 44
Posts: 1,510
Trader Rating: (0)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
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man why is zilvia so slow?!
jeebus! theres was a duck on the pond a robber stole a us savings bond the fairy beat the toothless kid with her magic wand some girls like to get pee'd on some things are way beyond.......comprehension
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12-27-2002, 03:00 AM
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#23 |
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BANNED
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b4 there was paper clips
back in the day b4 there were paper clips we had to take a grain of rice and stick all the papes together, man this was a hard job, i would come in at the morning and just be sticking pages together every day, well one day camppain went and beat the living **** out of a dwvave and stole this stron bent piece of metal from him, i was like wtf, stop bugging me im sticking pages, dont u know this is my job, camppain was like man check this out, i got this from a dwvave...i was like well whoppi do da day a ****en bent piece of metal, camppain was like ur right he gave it to sum wierdo dude named 3m....****EN NOW THAT BACK STABER WONT GIVE US CRAP CHANGE!
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12-27-2002, 03:03 AM
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#24 |
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BANNED
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ever just sit back, and look at sumthing, froma different angel, cuz when u look at somthing from a different angle it looks differnt, like the shading and stuff, also sumtings it being ocmpletely different, like this one time i was bangin a chick, i fell down and saw her from the the side and was like "dizzam this is a dog, whoopsi" yay so alreays rember to look at things at differnet angels thats they key to life
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12-27-2002, 03:09 AM
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#25 |
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back in the day
there were only two kinds of people, the people people and the people, now the people people liked poeple, they kick it with people, some people were like person people, but they were ocnsidered people people too. the people ont heo ther had where differnt. they were more into people, not like the people people. but mroe liek people are into people. these people were like pplz, i see sum personages like people personalaity them, they were shot. the end
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12-27-2002, 03:19 AM
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#27 |
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BANNED
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dude, one day i was going to the beach and i saw this dude and i was like "DUDE! ur the dude ofrmt he dell commercials" i cant ****en believe that dude" he was like "yay dude im that dude" i was like DUDE, dells ****en suck what where yout hinking dude" man he was mad. he kick my ass so hard i was like dude, please stop i was just ****ing with you dude, i mean damn dude cant you take a joke, he was like " o man dude, im sorry dude, i didnt know you were joking dude i thought it you were serious dude. i was like naw dude its all good dude. so now erhe striaght and eveyr thing i see that dude im like, i got a dell dude, you got a dell dude!
dude count = 21 |
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12-27-2002, 03:26 AM
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#28 |
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Will never get banned...
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: San Diego CA
Age: 44
Posts: 1,510
Trader Rating: (0)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
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dude we've been whoring alot today i bet all the dude moderators are gonna be like "dude these dudes are wayyyyyyyyy to happy or something dudes" we need to do something about these dudes cause like camppain and tofu those dudes are way out there, and that dude camppain wants to get banned dude i say we ban that dude so he can be like DUDEEEEEEEEE they banned me. then thier is that one dudette irena i heard she likes dudes, but to tell you the truth dude, i dont know about that dude story, dude. i mean if i was to look at this post id be like wtf are these dudes on? x or soemthing these dudes are pretty ****in ****ed up dude. i mean ive seen some far out **** before dude but this takes the cake dude.
seriously dude. this is gonna piss off the head dudes. i know id be pissed of if some dudes did that to something of mine id be like " AY DUDE WTF IS YOUR ****IN PROBLEM DUDEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" AND IF THEy said "dude **** you" ohh dude id get so ****in pissed dude you just dont know how piossed id be dude! all i gotta say is **** this **** dude 30 dude 1 dudette = big ol gangbang dude! wait that makes 31 dudes no wait now thats 32 dudes ohh now 33 dudes! ahh they keep piling on i cant stiop it dude! 35 dudes holy crap 36 dudes god damn 37 dudes they keep multiplying! *shoots himslef*
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-=-99 Sentra SE 5 speed-=- -=-95 240 SE 5 speed-=- Last edited by camppain; 12-27-2002 at 03:29 AM.. |
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12-27-2002, 03:32 AM
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#29 | |
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BANNED
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Quote:
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12-27-2002, 03:43 AM
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#30 |
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BANNED
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dude this one day i was going to the beach dude and i met up with one of my dude friends, i was like dude im going to the beach dude wanna join, he wa slike dude late dude im gunna bone sum chicks at this oen cool new bar, i was like dude, **** the beach im gunna bone chicks too dude, so us two happy dudes went to the bar. when we got to the bar dude were giggleing and **** were liek dude were gunna bone sum chicks DUDE!, high FIVE DUDE!. so we walk in and we see sum chicks dude and we like go to bone them and they say "dudes, get the **** off me dude" and i was like wtf dude. lets go to that cool looking dude over there and ask him wats going on dude, i thought were were suppose to bone chicks dude, so we go to the cool looking dude nad he turns out to be the bar tender dude. was like like you two dudes need to leave. i wa slike hay hay dude, STFU B4 i kcik ur ass dude. he kicked our assed and kicked us out dude. i was like DUDE HOW RUDE dude. well were waited out side the club, folloed the dude home, the next day when the dude went tow ork he boned his wife all day dude that was sum good ****, he had her yelling DUDE ALL ****EN NIGHT DUDE. then we took her to the club and boned her there, and we was pissed off as hell dude, her tried to kick us out but iwas to late dude. it was like ****en orgy time dude! HELL ****EN YAY DUDE!
dude count = 40 |
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