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Old 02-19-2004, 09:48 PM   #1
japboy06
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Random Farting!!

haha..ok...i have 2 stories...pls read them

Story 1:
My friend and I were hanging out at our friends apartment (shes a girl). She had a date that night with some dood that we really hate, so we wanna see this guy and beat him up or watever. Well, he gives her a phone call telling her that hell be there in a couple minutes or watever. So, she tells us to leave. She sat on her computer and we said goodbye. We left her room and head towards the door and said goodbye again. We opened the door, but didnt leave and closed it, pretending to leave. We hid in her closet and waited for the guy. She gets another phone call and its the guy, and we hear her say "Ill be out in a bit, I gotta do something real quick." Still not knowing were in her closet, she gets ready and heads for the bathroom. Next thing we hear, FART, u kno that sound when ur on the toilet, it kinda echoes against the inside of the toilet. HAHAHA we tried so hard not to laugh, but it was too funny. She was taking a POOPOO with the door open and she didnt kno we were there. MUHAHAHAHA funniest shiite ever. then she said "OMG, i didnt even close the door, get out!" hahaha...

Story 2:
It was a normal day in biology class 5LA. We were looking at mitosis and meisos specimens through the microscope. Anyway, people in class were having their usual conversations, but the class wasnt too loud, it was kinda quiet. My group and I were concentrating at looking at our specimens, but the group next to us were talking. One of the girls ends up laughing, and then out comes FART!...hahah it was really loud too. She was quiet after that. But i think i was the only one that noticed it. HAHAHAHA....I was still lookin in the microscope, but my eyes were tearing cuz i was trying so hard to keep my laugh in!..hahahaha

Story 3:
hahaha i wasnt there...but in HS...some dood on the basket ball was practicing one day, and he pooped in his panties, and it was all over the gym floor, hahaha. I heard it slid down his leg HAHAHHA.


HAHAHHAA...HAHA...pls share ur stories...cuz i kno there is stories HHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA HAHAHHAH
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Old 02-19-2004, 10:32 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by japboy06
haha..ok...i have 2 stories...pls read them

Story 1:
My friend and I were hanging out at our friends apartment (shes a girl). She had a date that night with some dood that we really hate, so we wanna see this guy and beat him up or watever. Well, he gives her a phone call telling her that hell be there in a couple minutes or watever. So, she tells us to leave. She sat on her computer and we said goodbye. We left her room and head towards the door and said goodbye again. We opened the door, but didnt leave and closed it, pretending to leave. We hid in her closet and waited for the guy. She gets another phone call and its the guy, and we hear her say "Ill be out in a bit, I gotta do something real quick." Still not knowing were in her closet, she gets ready and heads for the bathroom. Next thing we hear, FART, u kno that sound when ur on the toilet, it kinda echoes against the inside of the toilet. HAHAHA we tried so hard not to laugh, but it was too funny. She was taking a POOPOO with the door open and she didnt kno we were there. MUHAHAHAHA funniest shiite ever. then she said "OMG, i didnt even close the door, get out!" hahaha...

Story 2:
It was a normal day in biology class 5LA. We were looking at mitosis and meisos specimens through the microscope. Anyway, people in class were having their usual conversations, but the class wasnt too loud, it was kinda quiet. My group and I were concentrating at looking at our specimens, but the group next to us were talking. One of the girls ends up laughing, and then out comes FART!...hahah it was really loud too. She was quiet after that. But i think i was the only one that noticed it. HAHAHAHA....I was still lookin in the microscope, but my eyes were tearing cuz i was trying so hard to keep my laugh in!..hahahaha

Story 3:
hahaha i wasnt there...but in HS...some dood on the basket ball was practicing one day, and he pooped in his panties, and it was all over the gym floor, hahaha. I heard it slid down his leg HAHAHHA.


HAHAHHAA...HAHA...pls share ur stories...cuz i kno there is stories HHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA HAHAHHAH
hahahhahahhah nice dude!... today i was with my g/f and she said something really funny.... i sharted all over my pants....
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Old 02-19-2004, 10:37 PM   #3
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^^^^yeah, they call that the "hahahahah.....oh shit" feeling
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Old 02-19-2004, 10:42 PM   #4
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During gym class in the 8th grade, some guy knocked a fat wet one while he was in a sit-up contest. The sad part was that some chick was holding down his feet so he could do the sit-ups, so basically she was facing the fart...direct hit.
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Old 02-19-2004, 11:01 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by japboy06
haha..ok...i have 2 stories...pls read them

Story 1:
blah blah blah

Story 2:
blah blah blah

Story 3:
blah blah blah
Looks like 3 stories, Captain Can't Count. And immature stories, I might add.
-Jeff
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Old 02-19-2004, 11:04 PM   #6
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i like the fart and run technique. used often in the office place.
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Old 02-19-2004, 11:23 PM   #7
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Next time, go talk to a Salesperson and let out a silent but deadly one, and see how they "professionally" handle it.
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Old 02-19-2004, 11:40 PM   #8
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Haha that is great, I remember some kid in my gym class was doing the situps and seriously was sqeaking em out like every 2 or 3 situps. I have a pretty good one that happened yesterday this just reminded me.
So my friends and I decide to hit up goodwill, we are browsing around and my friend mike totally destroys, but its silent which made it worse and I was like man you stink and he laughed, it slowly got worse so we ran out of the isle and an elderly woman workign there was putting clothes on the racks and we heard her say "whew these shirts really stink" haha it was hillarious.
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Old 02-20-2004, 12:13 AM   #9
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the worst part about farting probably is when your in water and you let one out, and the bubble comes up and pops. but when it pops it smeels even worse.
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Old 02-20-2004, 12:15 AM   #10
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i'm so fucking immature.. i can't help myself from laughing at this shit.
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Old 02-20-2004, 12:19 AM   #11
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one of my favorite techniques is when i have a group of friends sitting down, then i slowly and gradually walk by them and fart in different sequences, so everyone gets a individual fart
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Old 02-20-2004, 12:53 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DRFT
the worst part about farting probably is when your in water and you let one out, and the bubble comes up and pops. but when it pops it smeels even worse.
Or when that lil bastard bubbled up in your swiming trunk, nice and warm.
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Old 02-20-2004, 05:10 AM   #13
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hahahaha this is great...i am laughing so hard
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Old 02-20-2004, 10:09 AM   #14
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my roomates farts are so loud we have friends (both guys and girl) come over from distant lands just to be entertained. the best part about it? they dont smell.. amazing!

simply amazing...
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Old 02-20-2004, 11:25 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dousan_PG
i like the fart and run technique. used often in the office place.
omg you're an 'office trailer'!!! argggh there's one guy here that always does that and thinks nobody knows. in reality ppl vacate as he walks by. btw this thread should get 5 stars for pure entertainment value. lol...
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Old 02-20-2004, 12:12 PM   #16
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Quote:
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i like the fart and run technique. used often in the office place.

yes that technique works wonders.
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Old 02-20-2004, 12:48 PM   #17
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haha...nice stories...but have u ever been around someone thats coughing alot and then outta no where they fart really loud...MUHAHAHAH..i remember i did that once at a chinese restaurant...hahaha...i tried to play it off by squeaking my shoes...HAHAHA

....or before in skool...i would fart in class...hahaha..so then i would try bumping the desk, squeeking my shoes, or dropping my books trying to make that sound again...HAHAHAHAHA
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Old 02-20-2004, 01:20 PM   #18
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I've been a victim of sit-up farts while holding someones feet. I let him go and he fell over. I once had a job that I hated. I hated my boss also. Everytime I had to fart I would walk by his desk and let out an SBD.
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Old 02-20-2004, 02:32 PM   #19
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HA, this is great. I shall contribute...
When I worked at MBNA there was this really pudgy lady that worked there and she was most annoying. She smelt pretty aweful too and I suspected she shit herself on several occasions. One day they moved her cubicle to the one behind mine adn she was training these 3 new people. She was particularly smelly that day, and I felt terrible for the newcomers. Then out of nowhere she sneezed really loud and this also caused her to fart, it was actually louder than the sneeze, everyone tried to ignore it but i was in tears. Then she had the follow up sneeze and it happened again, I died and had to laugh. I felt bad though because she was embarrassed. Apparently this then gave her the hiccups and while hiccuping she passed another pocket of gas and then ran to the bathroom. I don't think they sat anymore trainee's with her after that.
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Old 02-20-2004, 02:37 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KOUKI KA-T
HA, this is great. I shall contribute...
When I worked at MBNA there was this really pudgy lady that worked there and she was most annoying. She smelt pretty aweful too and I suspected she shit herself on several occasions. One day they moved her cubicle to the one behind mine adn she was training these 3 new people. She was particularly smelly that day, and I felt terrible for the newcomers. Then out of nowhere she sneezed really loud and this also caused her to fart, it was actually louder than the sneeze, everyone tried to ignore it but i was in tears. Then she had the follow up sneeze and it happened again, I died and had to laugh. I felt bad though because she was embarrassed. Apparently this then gave her the hiccups and while hiccuping she passed another pocket of gas and then ran to the bathroom. I don't think they sat anymore trainee's with her after that.
That is beyond funny, I would've laughed so hard after the first time lol. I have a really funny technique you are in your car and you totally blow ass but try to make it an SBD or muffle it with the seat, then wait 10 seconds or so and then say "hey do you smell burning wires?" kind of suggest the burning is over near the center console or your floor they will bend down there and take a huge wiff haha it's great.
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Old 02-20-2004, 04:03 PM   #21
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One of my friend would fart in the car then lock the feaking windows.
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Old 02-20-2004, 04:11 PM   #22
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My favorite ones are the silent, but smell like rotten eggs farts. It's best when there are a lot of people around, especially girls. Then you just get up and say "Dam" *insert friend's name* and walk away. Works like a charm.
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Old 02-20-2004, 04:43 PM   #23
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I remember once in sixth grade math class I had an enormous fart just sitting there waiting to come out. I was being very careful to not let it slip out. I had all my attention on controlling the fart but, then someone said something funny and I started to laugh. In my laughter I forgot about the fart and I moved in my chair. Now I was sitting on a wood chair and because I had been holding it in pressure had built up, so when it came out it was loud as hell. Everyone looked at me and some looked confused as if they had really heard what they thought they heard. All I could do was turn red and say "What? It wasn't me."
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Old 02-20-2004, 08:29 PM   #24
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bahahhahaha one time in high school, i was in class and i let out a REALLY loud one. but it sounded like BRR-R-R-R-R-R-RAPPP!! So it actually sounded like I just moved my desk on the floor or something, and I looked around and NOBODY suspected a thing!
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Old 02-23-2004, 10:53 PM   #25
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at Drift day me and my friend were sitting in my car, and I had a sneeze attack, my last sneeze was the best...

ahhhhh *riiiipp* it was SOOO funny cuz I didnt expect a fart to come out instead of a sneeze, we were both laughing so hard, then another buddy walked up and asked if we were smoking out in the car,,, I just told the truth and said yah, hahahaha
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Old 02-24-2004, 12:52 AM   #26
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Best farts ever are the ones that come out on each step of a stairway. My record for that is 12 steps/12 farts

Farting rules...

lol
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Old 02-24-2004, 08:55 PM   #27
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Originally Posted by Dousan_PG
i like the fart and run technique. used often in the office place.
That is almost as good as the "who shit in the stairwell" technique; where I start on the third floor and begin the LONGEST SBD I can muster and simply walk downstairs and wait for people to walk around the building like "who in the FUCK shit on the stairs?!!?"
Another good one I used to do when I was younger was the "dancefloor," where in a large crowded club you just totally rip ass in the middle of the dancefloor and just keep operating, who the hell hears it?
Then there's the "GOT DAMMIT DUTCHESS," I used to do when I was with one of my old girlfriends... Dutchess is my dog, and she likes to lay underfoot (I wish she'd learn that she is NOT a small dog) so I'd let a silent but deadly one, and my girl, knowing that I'm just crazy enough to do such a thing, would comment, I'd jump up and go "GOT DAMMIT DUTCHESS, GET OUTTA HERE!!!"
Or there were the times where we (Steeles, Jason, Corey and whoever else were around) were in the warehouse and I'd just drop one to fuck with everyone, just because I could.
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Old 02-25-2004, 12:01 AM   #28
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LOL these stories are hilarious

ive dropped the bomb in front of a friend sitting on a couch leaning forward with his mouth open! haha, yum!
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Old 02-25-2004, 11:59 AM   #29
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Holy ironic irony batman
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Old 02-25-2004, 03:57 PM   #30
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Ahahah that was great! .
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